Several weeks from now, it’s going to be October. We all know what that means; it’s going to be beer, beer, and more beer because of Oktoberfest. And as you’ve noticed, I’m overlooking September since I’m still assigned in Rockwell post for the whole month, which FYI– is the most benign post you’ll ever get assigned in. We hardly have multiple runs in a shift there. Sometimes we get lucky but most of the time we run once, and the rest is all eat and sleep.
It will be my first October in Lifeline so I’m not familiar with the statistics of trauma but I’m guessing we’ll be having Lifeline members driving piss-drunk that month. I could be wrong though; investing in healthcare is something a smart person would do. A smart person wouldn’t do stupid things like gulping vino and then go behind the wheel.. but hey, we can’t put alcoholics and juvenile delinquents out of the picture right? Haha. Let’s face it: idiot drivers will give me much of the practice I need in intubation. I swear if I encounter an RTA with GCS 8, the moment the cot locks at the back of the ambulance I’ll be over his head, prying his jaw open with a Macintosh. Medical practice. Nursing practice. Eh. There’s a reason why they attached the word “practice”. Of course I know what I’m doing; indications, advantages, disadvantages, complications.. I took ACLS. The success rate, however is an entirely different thing. I know what I’m doing, I’m just not that good at it yet. Burned!
So when October comes, think twice about driving drunk. Sure we’ ll save your life; dial 16-911 and we’ll be happy to extricate you from your Prius (with spinal immobilization of course). But the time you don’t respond to sternal rubs and then your oxygen saturation takes a nosedive below 90% despite a well secured BVM before we reach the nearest ED, I assure you I’ll be the first one to shove a tube down your throat. Drive safe people.
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