Pinangarap Mo Bang Maging Nurse? (Ako, Hindi)

Never in my wildest dreams have I thought that I will be a nurse. Ni hindi ko nga pinangarap na mapunta sa Ospital. All I wanted when I was a kid was to be famous in any field. I thought of being an actress or artista but I know hindi naman ako kasing ganda ng mga nasa TV. (If only I knew na mauuso ang retoke sana I should have tried my luck) I dreamt to be a beauty queen kasi uso yung mga beauty pageant dati and I memorized my spiels para sa question and answer portion pero sadly I accepted the fact na pangarap lang tlaga iyon… and I don’t think I can stand to be in national television walking on a swimsuit especially with my protruding tummy ^_^. So the last option to be famous is either to be in News where you committed a heinous crime or be the person who reports the current events. Siyempre ayoko naman maging kriminal para lang sumikat so dahil may pagka tsismosa naman ako minsan eh maging reporter na lang. Ang role model ko dati eh katulad nila Gloria diaz, Charlene Gonzales, o Miriam Quiambao pero naiba, naglevel up naman naging Jessica Soho. I wanted to be a brodcaster or a journalist that’s why I engaged myself in writing. I was a writer of our school paper way back high school days. I’m fond of public speaking and joined speaking contests pero siyempre hindi naman ako top student, natatalo pa din ako nung kalaban kong nasa honor roll kahit pa halos lahat ng lines sa oratorical piece eh nakalimutan niya. I still have my compositions when I was young. I kept all my diaries, short stories, and poems. Tanggap ko ng hindi ako magiging beauty queen or artista (laughing) but I told myself there’s only one dream that I’m not yet letting go, that is to write a book that will inspire others or be famous by sharing my experiences sa mga taong makakatulong ako.

1st lesson: There are dreams that you have to let go because whatever you do, it won’t happen. I gave up taking Mass Communication but instead took a pre-medicine course because my parents wanted me to be a doctor. Sa Pilipinas kasi, one of the most respected professions is being a Physician. We all have that mentality that if you are a doctor, matalino ka at yayaman ka. Medyo madrama ang buhay ko but I’ll skip that detail na lang and share my story with you. So I took BS Psychology because it sounds like an easy course for me. Inisip ko siguro walang masyadong Math ito kasi I hate numbers and I think they hate me too. Ok na siguro ito for a Pre-med course, madali-dali. I finished the degree and enjoyed the lesson that I have learned from it. I came to know myself. I learned how to understand people and their behavior. I was able to deal with the reality that life is indeed tough and we all have to learn to adapt or else we will all end up going crazy.

2nd Lesson: Acceptance. I’ve learned that I need to accept myself, my family, and the reality of my situation. Then review for entrance exam sa Medicine, that’s the time I realized I really don’t want to be a doctor. Ayoko mag-aral ng extensive hours at kailangan o unawain lahat ng sistema sa katawan ng tao. I confessed to my parents that I don’t want to be a doctor, and I’m not pushing through to Medicine proper. They don’t want to accept at first, syempre ang sarap nga naman pakinggan na may anak silang doktor o nagdodoktor. Panganay kasi ako sa amin and ayoko na iburden yung parents ko sa pagpapaaral sa kin.

Pumayag sila na hindi na ako magMed, sa isang kondisyon. Mag-aral daw ako ulit, this time Nursing na. Sabi daw ng tita ko na nasa Amerika. My gosh, ayoko nga magdoktor, dinemote naman ako, alalay na lang ng doktor. Iba nga kasi ang tingin ko dati sa mga nurse. Ayoko pero yun ang pinakamadaling way para makapag-abroad. Sabi nila yayaman daw ako pag nagNurse ako kasi nga mga doktor, dentista, engineer nag-nunursing. Isa ako sa mga professionals na naging 2nd courser kasi nga in-demand daw ang nursing. Naenjoy ko naman in fairness. I had good friends, I had good training, and my…

3rd lesson: I embraced caring, compassion, and humility. When I studied nursing, the caring attitude came naturally plus the fact that I’ve understood what being a nurse is all about. Complex pala, akala ko madali, hndi pala. Kasi dito sa propesyong ito, buhay ang nakasalalay sa kamay mo. Nurse ang mag-fifirst aid habang wala ang doktor, ikaw ang kailangan magbantay sa pasyente habang hindi pa sila ngararounds, at madalas ikaw pa ang sisisihin ng mga kamag-anak kasi akala nila dapat lahat alam mo at dapat lahat obligasyon mo.

Habang naghihintay ng resulta ng board exam, nagtrabaho ako sa call center. I heard almost all the unemployed nurses now are working in this setting. Hindi naman kasi masolusyunan ng gobyerno ang problema natin sa employment. Ang dami-daming nurse, pero walang trabaho and every year nadadagdagan ang libo libong nurses na walang mapagtrabahuhan. Noon, akala ko kapag nurse ka madali ka makakaabroad. Pero ngayon, sa US embassy, pag nakitang nurse ka at gusto mong pumunta kahit tourist lang, denied agad visa mo. Kahit mga NCLEX or CGFNS passer, nasa Pinas pa din hanggang sa magexpire ang USRN title. Sa UK, nauso ang student visa para sa nurses na kahit batikang nurse ka, ang trabaho mo, PT ( in english: wiping poopoo para hindi naman masyadong degrading and I’m working as HCA)

Madalas naiisip ko, mas naging burden ba para makapangibang bansa na nurse ka? Parang kulang pa kasi yung laki ng binayad nating mga nurse nung nag-aral tayo kasi napakarami pang gagastusuin para lang masabing full pledge RN ka. Di pwedeng RN lang kasi marami ka kakumpitensya, kasi lahat magaling kahit saan pang school ka graduate. Marami nagsasabi na nagsisisi silang nag Nursing sila, at kahit ako nasabi ko na sa sarili ko iyan lalo ngayong naranasan ko mag-abroad at mahirapan. Pero lahat naman ng bagay may purpose, wala namang aksidente. At ako malalaman ko din iyan pagdating ng araw. Hindi ako nawawalan ng pag-asa at alam ko hindi naman lahat ng bagay swertihan, mas maganda kung lahat pinagsisikapan.

Hindi naman kailangang madalian lahat, natutunan ko maghintay. Siguro likas nga lang sa mga tao ang pagkainip. Sa susunod, ikekwento ko naman ang buhay estudyante, kaibahan ng nursing at diskriminasyon sa UK.

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