SURPRISE!!!

 

Expect the unexpected. Brace yourself for a day of wonderment and what-the-hecks… of jaw-dropping and head-scratching incidents that defy explanations. You think you’ve seen it all?

Surprises abound in this place.  Not a 9-5 job where you pretty much can expect how you’ll spend your day.  And we love them.

Huh, Welcome to our Emergency Department.
At triage
Patient: “I swear I’m not pregnant. Shouldn’t be. I’m on the pill. But my belly hurts soooooo much!”
Nurse: “Let me just put you on the stretcher.”
Minutes later, the patient screams, the nurse lifts up the sheet, and finds a baby on the stretcher.
SURPRISE!!!

 

Nurse: “Miss, can you please give me some urine for a pregnancy test?”
Patient: (Giggles) “You’re so kind. I’m really a man. ”
SURPRISE!!!

 

Nurse: “Your son just went to x-ray, ma’am”.

Woman: (outraged) “Excuse me, that’s my husband.”
SURPRISE!!! (awkward, too)

 

Undressing a homeless patient then finding wads of twenty-dollar bills tucked away in his underwear. Total amount = $10,000.
SURPRISE!!!

 

Foreign body in rectum, all types, all sizes.
SURPRISE!!!

 

December blizzard 2010…EMS brought a patient on a sled.

SURPRISE!!!

 

Patients help each other. An intoxicated patient was carried into the ER on a grocery cart by a similarly-ETOH intox friend.

SURPRISE!!!

 

 

The nurse heard grunting from the other cubicle. Thinking “Molly” (one of our ER alcoholic regulars) was in pain, she drew the curtain. Molly and her boyfriend were in a compromising situation. So much for privacy.
SURPRISE!!!

 

At triage…
Patient: “I looked at the mirror and saw a blinking eye on my left butt.”
The nurse thought the patient was crazy, but the patient insisted in being examined.

So the nurse and the intern took the patient to the room and looked at the patient’s butt in question.  An eye blinked at them.

On a trip to South America, an insect had burrowed itself on the patient’s butt.

SURPRISE!!!

 

Everybody gasped. On the endoscopy machine screen, the patient’s stomach lining was littered with debris of her experiments with exotic food: an eraser, a paper clip, a teaspoon, a capped syringe, and a ring.
The GI consultant exclaimed, “So, that’s where my wedding ring went!”.

SURPRISE!!!

 

 

http://jo-cerrudo.blogspot.com/2011/02/surprise.html

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About Jo Cerrudo 39 Articles
Clinical Nurse Specialist in NYC. On a new journey of discovery. Author, "Nursing Vignettes", published Aug. 2012 (available on Amazon). E-mail: [email protected] Blogs: http://jcerrudocreations.blogspot.com/ http://jo-cerrudo.blogspot.com/
  • Marie Jose

    Cute. That’s why I love being an ER nurse.

  • That’s what I like in the ER. You see every unimaginable things. 🙂 #lols.

  • jane s.

    ER is full of surprises!!!! Love it.

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